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Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be an image of poster, magazine and text that says 'SEPTEMBER11 Today we remember. And our kids are watching how howwedoit. we do it. Howtotalka How Howtotalkaboutthisday Howto to talk about this day ateveryage at every age'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be an image of book, magazine and text that says 'Twenty five years later. this day still lands in the body. If your chest feels tight, if tears show up you did not plan on, fyou find yourself wanting everyone home and close, that is not weakness. That is memory living in your nervous system. Your kids do not notneed you to have it together. They need you honest and steady. 02'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be an image of poster and text that says 'KINDERGARTEN AND BELOW They need safety, not information. Keep the footage off. Little ones cannot tell the right now. difference between a replay and something happening If they notice you are sad: "Something sad happened a long time ago and today we remember the people. okay You are safe." am Then go do something ordinary together. Ordinary is the medicine. 03'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be a graphic of magazine, poster and text that says 'FIRST AND SECOND GRADE Simple truth, with the helpers in the story. and A long time ago, some people made a terrible choice lot of people were hurt. Today we remember the danger." them. We also remember the helpers who ran toward Answer the question they actually asked. Not the one you are afraid they will ask next. 04 04'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be an image of magazine, poster and text that says 'THIRD THROUGH FIFTH GRADE Facts, plus room to feel them. They have already heard something at school. Start Start there. "What have you heard about September 11?" Correct gently, fill the gaps, leave the images out of it. This is the age where "could that happen here?" shows up. Do not promise it never will. Tell them about the grown ups whose whole job is keeping them safe, and that you are one of them.'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be a graphic of lion, magazine, poster and text that says 'MIDDLE MIDDLESCHOOL SCHOOL Honesty, and help sorting what they found online. They have seen the footage. Ask what they saw and how it sat with them, then listen longer than feels comfortable. Talk about what came after. Strangers carrying strangers down stairwells. A whole country that stopped and looked at each other. Let them see the story does not end at the worst part. 06'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be an image of poster, magazine and text that says 'HIGH HIGHSCHOOL SCHOOL A real conversation, not a lesson. They can hold the complexity now. Fear, courage, politics, grief, all ofi at once. Ask what they think. Then tell them where you were. Your story is their history, and hearing it from you will matter more than anything a screen shows them. 07'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be a graphic of poster and text that says 'AND FOR THE ADULT CARRYINGIT Kids do not regulate from our words. They regulate from our bodies. Before you explain anything, take the breath. Feet δη the floor. Shoulders down. Jaw loose. You cannot talk a child into calm from a body that is bracing. 08'.
Photo by Stacy Jagger on September 11, 2026. May be an image of poster and text that says 'Remembering is not the same as reliving. We tell the truth. We name the helpers. We stay in the room while the feelings move through. And then we A make dinner, and and let ordinary life be the thing that heals.'.
Stacy Jagger@thedrsassyjagger
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Twenty five years today. Anniversaries do not live in the calendar. They live in the body. So if this one feels heavier than expected, that is not being dramatic. That is remembering. The harder part is that kids read the adults in the room before they read the news. They learn what to do with grief by watching what the grown ups do with theirs. Here is what helps, depending on the ages at your table. Little ones need safety, not information. Keep the footage off and go do something ordinary together. Six and seven year olds need the simple truth with the helpers left in it. Eight to eleven have already heard something at school. Ask what they heard before explaining anything. Middle schoolers have seen the footage. Ask what they saw, then listen longer than is comfortable. High schoolers do not need a lesson. They need someone to tell them where they were that morning. And before any of that, take the breath first. Kids do not regulate from our words. They regulate from our bodies. Tell the truth. Name the helpers. Stay in the room while the feelings move. Then go make dinner, and let ordinary life do what it does.

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@jennihalterman2019 Thank you for this. ❤️. First first was born 3 weeks before 911. I can't think about 911 without thinking of him. He's 25 now, and so is 9/11. Crazy how long it's been. This year my son became my hero as he helped me after a serious bike crash. So I told him about the helpers on 9/11. I thanked him for being a helper instead of a destroyer. He's always been my hero. ❤️. Let's focus on the heros.

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